The Worst Song Challenge
For a while now, Tom Scharpling has argued that Neil Diamond's "Porcupine Pie" has been "scientifically-proven" to be the worst song ever (listen at the 2:21 mark of the July 3 show from The Best Show on WFMU archives). No doubt, "Porcupine Pie" is a strong contender (that disgusted "Oh, my God" gets me every time!). But then I heard Ambrosia's "Cowboy Star (Edit)."
In a possible bout of early senility, I've been exploring the "soft rock" genre that I avoided like the plague in my youth (America, Bread, Poco, Little River Band, Boz Scaggs, Gerry Rafferty, etc.). And, I have to say, the results haven't exactly been fruitful. Sure, there have been a few songs that I remembered fondly from my youth (the Bread hits in particular), but like that Horse With No Name, I've often felt like I've been wandering around in a soft rock desert. Eventually, this admittedly bizarre experiment led me to Ambrosia's Anthology. So, it was with trepidation that I loaded the cd tray a couple weeks ago on a Saturday afternoon. Except for "Biggest Part of Me" which I recognized as a sappy wedding standard, the rest of the songs on the cd left me feeling woozy, like I had been submerged in some sort of easy listening miasma. And then "Cowboy Star (Edit)" came on. It was so bad upon first listen that it actually distracted me from the newspaper I was reading. "What the fuck is this?!" I grabbed the cd case to determine the song's title. After years of listening to music, having heard countless songs, I was convinced that I had just heard The Worst Song Ever.
So strong were my convictions, I issued a challenge to Tom Scharpling: "I've found a song that's even worse than "Porcupine Pie." He accepted my challenge. Hear the results at the 2:47 mark of the same July 3rd show from The Best Show on WFMU archives. Although "Cowboy Star (Edit)" had a strong showing, Tom wants to continue the debate (I think he's having a hard time accepting the fact that there may be a song more reviled than his dear "Porcupine Pie"). I'll keep you posted on future developments.
In a possible bout of early senility, I've been exploring the "soft rock" genre that I avoided like the plague in my youth (America, Bread, Poco, Little River Band, Boz Scaggs, Gerry Rafferty, etc.). And, I have to say, the results haven't exactly been fruitful. Sure, there have been a few songs that I remembered fondly from my youth (the Bread hits in particular), but like that Horse With No Name, I've often felt like I've been wandering around in a soft rock desert. Eventually, this admittedly bizarre experiment led me to Ambrosia's Anthology. So, it was with trepidation that I loaded the cd tray a couple weeks ago on a Saturday afternoon. Except for "Biggest Part of Me" which I recognized as a sappy wedding standard, the rest of the songs on the cd left me feeling woozy, like I had been submerged in some sort of easy listening miasma. And then "Cowboy Star (Edit)" came on. It was so bad upon first listen that it actually distracted me from the newspaper I was reading. "What the fuck is this?!" I grabbed the cd case to determine the song's title. After years of listening to music, having heard countless songs, I was convinced that I had just heard The Worst Song Ever.
So strong were my convictions, I issued a challenge to Tom Scharpling: "I've found a song that's even worse than "Porcupine Pie." He accepted my challenge. Hear the results at the 2:47 mark of the same July 3rd show from The Best Show on WFMU archives. Although "Cowboy Star (Edit)" had a strong showing, Tom wants to continue the debate (I think he's having a hard time accepting the fact that there may be a song more reviled than his dear "Porcupine Pie"). I'll keep you posted on future developments.
posted by BayonneMike at 9:47 AM
4 Comments:
Hey,associate rock of FMU. Trust your own judgement. If your callers can't agree, cut 'em loose. On the air. kidding...lay low.
awesome segment!
gotta say, your scholarly study of all things soft is a little creepy (though 'silk degrees' has been a saturday morning staple in the GIHYB HQ for years), but findin that song is probably worth the scorn and ridicule your neighbors now whisper behind your back. your kinda like charley in that last episode of lost ... and who doesn't wanna get their ass kicked by 2 hot women as foreplay to drowning?
BAYONNE!!!
Now that CBS-FM 101.1 is back, so is "We Built This City on Rock 'n' Roll." That's one crappy song with a great hook.
What do you think of Wilco, speaking of soft rock? My son has SKY BLUE SKY and I gave it a listen. I like it. My son says critics hammer it as Dad Rock [John Mayer being Mom Rock I guess. I think I told you that we met him once at PARAGON, at the hunting knife counter.].
I thought the new Wilco was a little dull. Pleasant enough at times, but dull overall. It would fit right in there with my soft rock experiment.
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