Great news!
Not only may cell phones be responsible for future massive food shortages, they may also cause brain tumors, kill brain cells to the extent that teenagers may go senile by the time they reach middle age, reduce sperm counts in men, and may be linked to cancer. Will this have any effect on cell phone users? Of course not! But at least now I have some scientific evidence to back my refusal to join the cell phone crowd. The urge for humans to have conversations like this is just too strong:
Cell phone user: Yeah, I'm on the train.
Cell phone user: I'll be home in a few minutes.
Cell phone user: I'll see you in a bit.
Now when people look at me like I'm a freak because I don't have a cell phone, I'll just say, "Think of the bees, man, think of the bees."
Cell phone user: Yeah, I'm on the train.
Cell phone user: I'll be home in a few minutes.
Cell phone user: I'll see you in a bit.
Now when people look at me like I'm a freak because I don't have a cell phone, I'll just say, "Think of the bees, man, think of the bees."
posted by BayonneMike at 9:09 AM
5 Comments:
I don't have one but if I borrow Margie's, I keep it in a jacket or coat pocket. Even though we're finished having kids, no sense placing all those emf waves in my pants pocket.
My father worked in a NYC Transit power house. It contained an enormous motor that boosted the electrical power along the rails. He went to a lot of funerals of guys who died too soon. The air was laden with iron dust and magnetic field.
We are killing ourselves with small talk. Shuttin down the population and wiping out the crops... Not to mention the brain damage.... I was on that thing for 7 consecutive hours once...or twice. My memory is not quite up to par and I can't even see straight anymore. All I can do is ramble and babble. Get the word out, Mike. We are the FREAKS!!!
I'm with you. I HATE my cell phone. My husband likes me to have one, just in case...(of what I don't know) or maybe he just wants to know he has total access 24/7.
I rarely keep it with me so frig that. Good for you!
I agree about the ridiculous overuse of telephones by the vast majority of people I see everyday. It's another crutch for many people as well as a dangerous distraction when they are driving.
But, I think you might be missing the point regarding having a cell phone.
Of course 90% of the conversations are inane chatter. And I don't know anyone who uses the phone less than I do. But you don't have to pick up the phone when you don't want to, especially a cell phone.
I just want to reach and be reachable in emergencies and near emergencies. All of these have happened and probably each scenario was gonna work out OK the way it did in the last millenium. It just seemed so much easier having the cell phone:
- Car went off the road in the Adirondacks during an ice storm
- Car broke down 3 miles from the nearest exit on the thruway
- Kid sick in school and nobody home
- Very late picking up kid because of intense traffic
- Meeting anyone any where there are thousands of people
I don't have any urges to talk to any one on the phone. But I'm even less desirous of walking to find help in the middle of the night when it's sleeting, raining, etc.
Of course there are practical uses for the cell phone, yakimba, but as you noted these are rare. Personally, I can think of only a handful of instances where a cell phone would have come in handy over the course of several years now that I'm aware that I'm doing without. What I kind of resent is the disappearance of public pay phones with the proliferation of cell phones. Now, if I'm in an emergency, I'll likely have to depend on someone else's cell phone. But even there I save, too, so I guess I shouldn't complain.
I still think it's more a menace than a useful tool. Last night a middle-aged woman on the train was playing some idiotic game on her phone with the sound turned up full blast. The phone sounded like a damn slot machine. Not once did it occur to her that she was being inconsiderate to everyone around her. Since being loud and rude in public via the cell phone is now the norm, people don't even consider it impolite.
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